|
|
Couple's decision to avoid abortion rewarded in life of young daughter By Rebecca Ducusin
Joe and Pauline Sinicrope
from North Bay decided to have their first child despite the doctor's diagnosis
of spinabifida, indicated by a spot on the child's spine by ultrasound.
Joe recalled that period in their life when they "were very happy to be
having their first child" and when they first learned of the problem in
Pauline's A problem
Visions of a child that would
not be able to walk hit Joe. He called the doctor to ask whether he was
sure about what he shared to Pauline. The doctor said yes, there was a
spot on the child's spine. "I asked him what we could expect in terms of
the health of the child. He told me that it could be anything from an inability
to walk and control of the bladder to a child that would be retarded, to
a child that would die shortly after birth. I was quite shaken by what
he told me."
At home he found his wife
crying for she was terrified about what she had read. Pauline shared to
him what she had learned. He too began to cry again and took one of the
books. "After looking at the photographs of children,
I flung the book across the room in a rage," said Joe.
Limited choice
As Joe waited, he read a
magazine to keep his mind off of what was happening. "My wife and I still
had hope that there was a mistake and that our child would be fine. Neither
Pauline nor I supported abortion. There was no way, no matter what, that
we were going to abort this child," he said.
As Joe joined his wife who
was alone in the room, she shared that the doctor said it was spinabifida.
"Our hope that it was all a big mistake was dashed."
When the doctor came in,
"the first words out of his mouth were that we should consider having an
abortion. The first words out of my mouth were that, ‘that is not an option
for us.' He did not mention it again," Joe said.
No mistake?
Five days later they were
in Toronto. Their first appointment was at the Spinabifida Association.
"It was heart-wrenching to
see these children. There were children with misshapen heads and misshapen
legs everywhere in wheelchairs. I had visions of my own child looking like
that in a wheelchair," Joe said.
They told the doctor why
they thought that their child could not have spinabifida. Sometimes at
night, Pauline would have her stomach against his back and the child kicking
so hard that it felt like the child's foot was going through her stomach
and through his back. He remembers being awakened in this fashion at least
three times.
"The doctor looked at me
as if thinking ‘you poor fool.' He said, though that it was possible, but
the fact the child was kicking did not mean anything. He told us all the
possible problems that our child could have. The spot on the child's spine
was at the low end of the spine. The doctor stated that this would probably
mean the child would not be as handicapped as the child would be if the
spot were higher up on the spine. Pauline and I came away from that meeting
with even more despair than when we arrived that morning," Joe said.
For their next appointment
at North York General Hospital they went directly to the ultrasound department.
The couple had been trying to find out the sex of the child since the first
of many ultrasounds, but were always told that the child was turned the
wrong way. The technician had said that he could not tell.
Upon meeting with the doctor
in another office in the building, he said that it certainly was not spinabifida.
"Whatever had been there, if anything, was gone. The way he described it
to us, it seemed that it could have been an error in the ultrasound. There
may have been something there that was simply part of the child continuing
to develop.
"We were ecstatic. It certainly
was an amazing day. We went from the depths of despair to the heights of
euphoria. We both profusely thanked the doctor. I thanked God for his help
and mercy in making our child healthy," Joe recalled.
Joe was present when the
child was born. "She was a perfectly healthy child. Francesca has brought
us a great deal of joy. Rarely a day passes that I look at her and think
that had we been other parents, she would not be here today. When I think
about this, it frightens me. I wonder how many children are being killed
out there.
Chance at life
Aunt Margaret Sinicrope in
Toronto says Francesca is such a lively affectionate child, and she has
amazingly ready, smart answers to all questions. A sweet gift and blessing,
she said.
|