Joe Campbell

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Deconstructing the deconstructionists

Deconstructing the deconstructionists

Joe Campbell Liberalism is a smiley-faced demolition project – in a purely positive, hopey-changey sense of the word “demolition,” that is. Since the innumerable “social constructs” that litter the highway of history are impediments to human progress, the time has come to clear them out of the way. Margaret Mead taught us that patriarchy was a social construct. According to moral relativists, right and wrong are social constructs. Recently ... (Continue reading)

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Indigestible

Light is Right Joe Campbell I’m a victim of textual harassment. Texts that pressure me to buy, subscribe, donate, bequeath, support, upgrade, downsize, respond and beware invade my snail and electronic mail boxes daily. Not only do they pressure me to change my life. They hassle me to plan my death. It’s more than I can stand, especially as radio and TV hucksters harass me ... (Continue reading)

Death wish

“Fear not,” Dingwall said, when I complained about the Supreme Court’s invalidation of the law against physician-assisted suicide. “What do you mean ‘fear not’?” I replied. “The learned judges are turning compliant doctors into legally approved merchants of death.” “They turned into that when the unlearned politicians legalized limited abortion and the Supreme Court removed the limits.” “In both cases,” I conceded, “the Court ruled that the existing laws violated the right to life, liberty and security of the person. However, by doubling ... (Continue reading)

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A gas for all seasons

Light is Right Joe Campbell As I used to compose them, headlines rarely excite me. Recently, though, I read one that did. It said Climate change could be the cause of record cold. I was excited because my meteorological mentors also call climate change global warming. As both labels contain the same number of letters, the headline writer might as easily have typed Global warming could be the cause of ... (Continue reading)

A fate worse than death

I’ve always known that our situation is risky. I thought, though, that risk was about the chances of suffering ill fortune, like dying unexpectedly. It didn’t occur to me that it might be about the chances of enjoying good fortune, like escaping death unexpectedly. Risk is the downside of chance, not the upside, or so I assumed. My insurers gave me no reason to think otherwise. Their life insurance isn’t against life. It’s against death. Their home insurance isn’t against homes. ... (Continue reading)

New but not nice

T hey say that computers are becoming more like us. I don’t care if they are as long as we don’t become more like them. I wouldn’t want us to treat our elders the way computers treat theirs. Why, new computers are so full of themselves they want nothing to do with the old ones and eventually don’t even communicate with them. I know, because I’ve got an old computer and watching the new ones shun it ... (Continue reading)

A coat hanger bill of rights

Light is Right Joe Campbell My plumber impressed me when he drove up in a box truck full of tools and spare parts. Although I had let my fixtures deteriorate significantly, resulting in leaky faucets, faulty flushing devices, clogged drains, and the like, he was ready for anything. Or so it seemed. After several hours of inspecting, repairing, and replacing, he took on a bathroom sink that ... (Continue reading)

Take a vow

Light is Right Joe Campbell To wed is to marry. But there are differences. Weddings, including related celebratory events, last a day or two. Marriages, including related blessed events, last a lifetime. This, at any rate, is the intention. And yet couples often spend more time preparing for weddings than for marriages. Maybe that’s why failed marriages outnumber failed weddings. When they fail, marriages usually end in ... (Continue reading)

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Seeing Red

It looks as though the Senate is here to stay, unreformed and unloved. I’m speaking, of course, of the Canadian Senate, also known as the Red Chamber. The nickname, from the traditional royal colour of the interior, symbolizes historic links with the Crown. The Senate also has historic links with patronage appointments, a sense of entitlement and, more recently, an expense claims scandal. Maybe we should re-nickname it the Red-Faced Chamber. The Senate is also called the chamber of sober second thought. ... (Continue reading)

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Beware the sexperts

Light is Right Joe Campbell Like me, you might not have known that sexpert is an officially recognized word. Well, it is. You can look it up in the Oxford dictionary, which defines it as an expert in sexual matters. I don’t object to the word. I do, however, object to the definition. I think it should be an alleged expert. Years ago, sexperts told us that we ... (Continue reading)

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Excluded

Light is Right Joe Campbell I’ve tried, really I have, but I can’t understand why, as a society, we discriminate so aggressively against homosexuals. Rare is he, or she, who at some point in life does not need help for mental, physical or spiritual disorders, if not all three. But when homosexuals need help, we deny or ignore afflictions that ought to be obvious to anyone, ... (Continue reading)

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Supernatural

Light is Right Joe Campbell Judges think they’re divine, apparently. When interpreting the constitution, they can create something out of nothing. That’s what they did with same-sex “marriage.” Lawyers know they’re human, apparently. When pleading cases, they can create something out of anything. That’s what they did when they made sleepwalking a defense against murder charges. An even more creative defense awaits them. It originated with ... (Continue reading)

The ‘news’

The ‘news’

Light is Right Joe Campbell I used to think that I recognized what news is. After all, I spent most of my working life in the news business. I don’t mean to say that I could define news. I wasn’t sure that I could. But like the jurist who wasn’t sure that he could define obscenity, I knew it when I saw it. Now, however, I seem ... (Continue reading)

The ultimate euphemism

Light is Right Joe Campbell “Yes,” Dingwall said, “I’m speaking out. I’ve reached the point where I can remain silent no longer.” I was taken aback. Dingwall is the last person I would have accused of not speaking out. “To preserve my sanity,” he said, “I have no choice but to admit that I’m abused.” “Abused?” I repeated, startled. “Not verbally, emotionally, psychologically, physically or sexually. I’m abused intellectually. ... (Continue reading)

Vested interests

Light is Right Joe Campbell “They considered the science settled,” Dingwall said. “On global warming?” I asked. “On global immobility,” he replied. “In the seventeenth century, influential academics insisted that the earth is the immovable centre of the universe and the sun orbits it. That’s why they rejected Galileo, who asserted the opposite.” “It sounds a lot like today,” I said, “when influential academics insist that, because of human ... (Continue reading)

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